Why I Need Feminism For My Own Selfish Masculine Self

This is not your everyday article on why men would benefit from feminism. This is not an attempt at representation of the issues men or boys face due to gender roles reinforced by the society. This is not an outcry on anyone else’s behalf. I have written down why, just my one singular existence, could have been better with feminism. This is the rundown that underlies my realization that even for strictly selfish reasons, a man can and does want feminism:

 

Because the very same people who mocked me for “always reading like girls” were the ones who discouraged the women in their families from pursuing higher education. Because the same boys who rationalise that they lose out to women in exams for “having many more outdoor activities” are the first to mock a studious boy for coming second to a girl.

 

Because cricket in this country is a sort of patriotic uniform for men that women may also wear if they like. I couldn’t just grow up in India without being belittled for sucking at cricket, and can’t live an adult life without being scorned for my indifference to the live cricket matches. Because the increase in the numbers of women participating and representing the nation in sports is sadly used to shame the men who are not into any sport: “these days even women play cricket and you hide among books”. Because encouraging women to live their dreams isn’t good enough if not coupled by adequate bashing of the reinforced gender roles. Because the sight of a man who doesn’t do outdoor sports begets the automatic question “how do you even de-stress yourself?”. I would want to go like “Word games, duh!” But perhaps the only acceptable indoor game suiting my gender in this society, is chess, which isn’t my thing either.

 

Because I grew up learning that I become a man when I learn to carry a woman on a vehicle, not when I learn to carry myself in front of a woman. Because when feminism brings about a dissolution of gender roles, I can hope that the example of women who drive geared bikes in a place like India would not be used to shame the minority of men who learn it late, cannot or do not wish to learn it.

 

Because I am labelled as ‘anhedonic’ for not participating in group objectification of women – in classifying them based on their curves. Because the concept of sapiosexuality is alien to the society which reinforces that a woman may desire ‘intelligent’ men oriented towards getting better degrees and jobs, but a man may just stick to ‘sundar and susheel’ (beautiful and good natured, in that order of screening). Because I can’t acknowledge my readiness to mingle with women, in front of my male friends, without immediately being shown the most ‘beautiful and easy’ girl of my supposed religion.

 

Because it is not enough for people to just express their disdain for my introversion, they have to blend it with their disdain for housewives in saying “come out and enjoy like men, don’t just sit inside the house like a housewife”. Because if all women could one day freely walk on the streets at night, introversion of boys and men like myself could at least cease to be considered an issue about a deficit in, or a problem with our masculinity.

 

Because there have been actual instances when revealing that I am a physician, to people who do not even know my personality, was followed, not by “he must be saving lives” but by “he must be a dowry magnet”. And I could use the surest tone of my voice to declare that I wouldn’t accept dowry, but it wouldn’t matter, people would say “you’ll accept it when it is presented to you, who doesn’t?”. This annoying and repetitive line is homologous to, “so okay you do not worship God now, but you will do so, on your deathbed”.

 

Because I can’t get any more tired of “All men want only one thing” from both men and women. 

 

Because I have been called rude and weird for not chatting up women with small talk, because when a man is trying to connect to a stranger, small talk is considered essential with women and optional with men. Because it is important that people realise that my speech need not be buttered up just because I am talking to the ‘tender’ gender, that I can use inoffensive straightforward words in acceptable tone with strangers of all genders.

 

I have not written this to urge other men to identify with my experiences, I have written this to urge them to look back at their own experiences and ask themselves, and let us all know, if their lives could have been better with feminism having worked in those dimensions, time included. It is an important idea that needs to come out louder, that male feminists aren’t just accepting feminism, brought about by the females, but we want feminism, and we will want it, even if we are stripped off the nepotistic or altruistic reasons for wanting it in the world. Guys, ask yourselves!

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War on the new year

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So during the last week or so, the things trending in my facebook news feed were: the war on christmas, on why atheists can celebrate christmas, on why you can remove the “christ” from the christmas, and all those trying to remind that it is a mythmas. I have never given a fuck about christmas and this year is was no different. I am not into celebrating birthdays either. 2014 is just there and my balance in personal ‘fucks account’ is still zero. However, I totally understand, feel and not enjoy people celebrating these things. Its fun to watch and analyze how others get crazy. But this post is not about my personal preferences. It is about the incompetent yet pathetic war on celebration of the new year. But why did I tell you about me? We’ll see that later on…

Impersonally, I find January 1st, the best festival humanity has ever bothered to celebrate. It is the only part of the year when, for the greatest portion of human population, all the individual differences don’t matter. Some nationalists have pointed out to me that the Indian youth should celebrate the Indian Independance day more passionately than January the 1st. I often want to go “its like an animal celebrating the passage of a multiple of 365.25 days since the conquest of its native territory”. But I don’t, let them whine, I say. And as far as the country of my birth and residence (India) is concerned, the idea of independance is so funny, its almost like christmas, based on a propagated myth. If I happened to be in those countries where the idea of Independance makes sense, I might throw away a few social fucks about it, but its still about the shitty sibling of religion called nationalism. January 1st is, (and its likely to remain so for many years to come), the only day where the celebration crosses most political, regional, religious, social and economic and whatever fucking  differences.

Now someone would argue the same about christmas, as it does cross many of the barriers that January 1st does. Yes on December 25th, the majority of the human population does settle down and celebrate. Don’t worry I m not bringing the time travelling muslims to strengthen the case against christmas. A good fraction of non-christians don’t celebrate christmas at all (without having having any form of butthurt-itis characteristic of those time travelling muslims). Their reason would be simple, they don’t have enough christian friends around to create the hype. Or they never grew up celebrating christmas. India would be a good example, in a lot of clusters, people just treat christmas as a holiday, not a reason to celebrate. Of those that do celebrate, I dont think they share the same feelings about the festival. And there are things that people talk on each christmas like: the war on christmas, the boring historical reminders about the truth of december 25th and debates about the same, parent discussions about the recommended modifications in the myth about santa for children and blah blah. When the whole world needs a common day to celebrate, it has to be essentially free of time-inappropriate discussions like these.

It’s not the same with January 1st, people have more or less the same reasons for celebration and there little or no irritating discussions on the day. People relate their life events to the common global calender. It does make some sense to program yourself into pretending that, at the end of a calender year, your old shit is left behind, while in the head feeling that a long duration of time, called an year, has passed away and you need to gear up in life, do the things you are missing out on, or just recollect your year in a flashback. Just pointing that we don’t tend to do this rethinking and revaluating process on any other day, not even the birthday. Another important reason, it is on this day that we can mourn for the extremist muslims, who prefer to live as living fossils and declare a war on this peaceful festival.

Images of this kind are being shared as a part of this impotent verbal attack on the new year.

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I encountered one such person today, in real life. She is a well respected and loved teacher. I didn’t bring in the topic of new year or even anything remote, not today, not ever! She knew I wasn’t going to do anything about the change of date, especially since I use only digital calenders! But she had to bring it out of nowhere, as a conversation starter, and piss me off…

She: I am glad that I am not a slave of the christians to celebrate their festivals, I am not going to wish anyone on the christian new year. (It is funny how these burqa packed women call others as slaves).

Me: Thanks for mentioning, it doesn’t make sense to wish you for the new year 2014, when I am the only one among us who is moving into it!

She: What? (she obviously didn’t get the intended joke, which is why I am telling you)

Me: But I am sorry I didn’t wish you on your birthday. (fake apology, obviously)

She: And I took care of it by not wishing you on yours, although I know you don’t care about your own birthday.

Me: Hmm. Very nice and smart of you to take your revenge without even hurting me. Your lot should learn something from you.

She: Yeah, whatever. (She was clearly offended about the phrase “your lot” but I strongly suspected that she didn’t catch any other part of the sentence. It is one of the techniques these theists use, they just don’t listen you intently, all their limited attention is for those more fanatic than themselves).

Me: (I couldn’t resist to clarify) I meant that if your lot could figure out ways to take a revenge without bombing others every now and then, that would do a lot good to the world.

She: (Vey angry) It is only a tiny fraction of muslims who blow up people. Islam means peace.

Me: (postponing the laugh about the second statement). I agree they are a smaller portion, but how are you different from them? Are you telling me that the audience of the gladiator shows who did the “thumbs down” were in principle, any different from the people who actually murdered others for fun?

I don’t care how each one of you interprets the quran, for each one of you is obviously free to follow things prevalent in the modern society, that are not dictated in quran, because for instance you celebrate your birthday. Did Mohammed celebrate his birthday? What kind of doll did Aisha demand for her 7th birthday? (She ran away but I continued in my head)…. It is the change you would want to see in the world that matters. A hardworking teacher and a suicide bomber, both think that jews and christians are what is wrong with the world. You belong to “their lot” precisely because you are travelling back in the same time-machine, you might be on the passenger seat, some of the others might be in the driver’s seat, but all of you want more and more people on board, including your infants and children. Is there even a single day in your muslim calender when all muslims unite to prove the world how your religion is a religion of peace?

shit vaxxers say

there are just TOO MANY herbs out there, who knows how many poisons, infections and vectors, ALFATOXINS nd SULFUR, ALUMINUM, n MAGNECIUM!!….many peeps have DIED REPEATEDLY THRU HISTORY eating them CRAZY MUSHROOMS.

 

Naturalnews evil scumbags are tryin to take us back 2 pleesetoscene days were most of the ANCESTORS WERE INCESTORS WHO DIED AFTER TRYING THEM HERBS!! i aint putting anything natural shit and UTRA TOXIC stuff like that in my veins.

 

whale.2 tryin to make you lik DORFINS!! …..TOP SECRET PROJECTS ……REVERSE EVOLUTION, genetic engingeer and who noes what not….. yo dont see in TVs…. DOLFINS R GETTING SMART, learnin people stuff. // u even KNOW ENDORFIN MEANING? Lemme spel for you FucKS, It is “EN = INSIDE + DORFINS!!! ……Y don you google history of man, moron mommies without PhDs!!

 

If them mommie instincts are so affective, why do mommas have to force it on thier children? haha GOT YU?!! Your attachment parenting causes autism!! http://www.skepticalob.com/2010/11/attachment-parenting-causes-autism.html

 

WATER MEMORY is the goverbment’s way of POISONING your D&A and make you sterile and give your kids AUTISM!!! ……I saw evidence in a ONE SINGLE youtube video why you no see it fucking antivac!!?!

 

i m discusted with all you IGNORANT PEEPS, doo some REEL RE-SEARCH morons, homoeopathic electromolecular spetrum fingerprinting is done to tap your thoughts by NSA, goddam NSA. these MUTATED particles go to FAT CELLS IN YOUR BRAIN THRU SPINAL CORD, and you BEHAVE LIKE DRONES!!

 

HITLER was an experimenting homeopath!! them concentration cAmps were homeopathy field trials, treating jewes like labrats. natural news wont tell you y he ws vegetarian?1! go watch history channel, you foolishes!! I KNEW IT that you praise hitler, you Luc like fanatic christian!!

 

very few guys know that methanol is mixed with alcohol to make the homeo meds, a fact BigWHALE and BigNATURE are trying to hide from the world. they do EVERYTHING they can to divert you mommies with issues into thinking the same about vaccines. that is more common in developing countries where the locale goverbment is tryin to control population control and stuff like that. poor people. faux news show, check it dumbass. METHANOLE MAKE FORMALDEHYDE inside them bodies and PEOPLE ARE DYING!!

 

number of patents visiting chiropracters has increased thousands off times in last 50 years!! that in DIRECT PROPORTION to increase in spine complaints//…..dont you see the proof idiot gulble sheepel!! this proofes that all these spine problems have come bcoz of chiropracters!! Our ancesters never had spine problems!!

 

they deleted my link to pubmed. cold hearted bitches!! people hav bcum cold hearted becoz accupuncturist taps and turns off them NERVE ENDINGS that take KARMIC GOOD EMOTIONS TO BRAINS!!

 

these magnet therapy bands are EVIL CONSPIRASIES!! they are foolin round you sheepel and turning your positiev energy into negative powwer!!

 

hahaha. FLU SHOTS ARE ONE 100% percent safest. my COUSIN’s first boyfriend GOT IT, AND HE becaome VAX PRO!! !! …. YOU LOOSERS,

 

you must be that person who is JEALOUS OF BILL GATE MONEY!!…. U AND YOUR POOR PERYL DOREY will die of Accquired AIDS HAHAHA…. ITS YOUR POOR KIDS, i wish they were in africa.

 

obama and osama, satan and santa, Meryl-Peryl, Luc-fluke!! dont ya mommies see the pattern of EVIL IN DYSGUYSE!

 

wakefield is spawn of SATAN!! yu are going to ROT IN HELL like your POISON HERBS ROT ON EARTH if yu dont vaccinate kids.

 

polio cases are outbreaking becuase OPRA WANNA SHOW ON THEM VACCINE DENIED KIDS…. you centimental fools!! ….jenny is just marketing embassaddore for her!! she had ELECTRA COMPLEX FOR HER UNBORN DAUGHTER, then diagnosiss came wrong and they told it was a SON !! ….don u kno she made her son autistic with attachment parenting? read this mrs gulible!!

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My little poem on homosexuality

Ever wondered why the abrahamic god hates sodomy? Because god is an asshole, and seriously, ask yourself, if you were an asshole, would you sanction people fucking you with all their might?

 

Girl or guy, black or white, gay or straight, fat or thin,

they all can have good or bad traits from within,

throw your stone age scriptures in the bin,

cause homosexuality is not a sin.

 

Not a harmful perversion that has to cease,

homosexuals need nothing but a release,

from the hate, stigma, pity and tease,

we don’t cure something that is not a disease

 

homophobes are the real threat to society,

some have a distorted view of morality,

some are in adamant denial of reality,

others have repressed homosexuality.

The comedy of gifts

Where do we start off on a discussion about reproduction? A scientific discussion about reproduction starts with the development of germinal cells in a fetus which develop on their way to become fully functional adult reproductive organs and from there on to conception upto the child birth. But what are creationist discussions concerned about, under the heading of “reproduction”? Their idea of human life is a gift from god, and any discussion about the manufacture of this gift is often suppressed by “god did it”. So what is this gift supposed to be? Sperm? ovum? viable fetus? newborn? Creationists aren’t heard of talking like “god gifted the man a sperm and the woman an ovum, from which they could conceive a zygote”. So is it a viable fetus? No, because the knowledge of age of viability was not known in biblical times and jesus never bothered to get bible updated on this. Its not a newborn because there is a deadly idea called “anti-abortion”. Creationists aren’t heard of making distinctions between “zygote”, “embryo” and “fetus” in their anti-abortion propaganda, perhaps because of their ignorance of human embryology (I take it that they are ignorant of human embryology because it is actually a telltale of human evolution). Now, even if you confront a creationist with the implications of the differences between an embryo and a fetus, they are unlikely to care because it cant be like god put the fetus in there. He obviously did put the embryo. So it turns out that the starting point of any creationist’s discussion of “life” is that zygote which transforms into an embryo in no time.

1) THE GIFTS THAT WERE MEANT TO BE TAKEN BACK
How would you like if someone snatches away roughly 50% of the most awaited gifts that they sent to your doorstep? What if you learn that he snatches away some of those gifts as soon as he places them on your door? I m talking about this “gift” of life, which unknown to most people on earth, is taken away from the womb (aborted) 50% of the time, naturally, without human intervention. Most of these are due to inherent defects in the embryo/fetus that are incompatible with intra-uterine survival (let alone extra-uterine survival as a newborn). Since a creationist pro-lifer’s contention is that it is a sin to reject a gift from god, I take it that they assume that god is in control of the gifting process. What do we infer from this?
  1. God is the one of most inefficient manufacturers known sending you defective products 50% of the time. This single handedly shuts the flawed proposition that “god is impeccable”, “god has never failed”. Needless to point out that their scriptures themselves are a “proof” that god has failed in multiple famous biblical tales. The fact that his own creation can thoroughly figure out his mammoth failures undermines pascals wager and threats of a hell. What if 50% of the entries into hell are erred?
  2. Some theists might want to try shifting the blame to Satan, conveniently forgetting that the implication is that Satan is actually more powerful than god, screwing up 50% of his gifts. It would be even more shameful for god to prevent us from ethically increasing that percentage by a few extra percentages. As much as your god finds babies tasty, the best chance he seems to have against majority of human-induced gift-screwing is petty impotent anti-abortion campaigns by Christians.
  3. since some of the embryos do go on to be born, it implies that all humanity’s induced abortions combined are still not a match for god’s abortion rates. God was and remains the greatest abortionist ever.
2) GIFTS THAT WON’T WORK IN YOUR WORLD ( OUTSIDE THE UTERUS)
Ok, we all know that god hates women, especially their reproductive tract, but since this article is not about it, we are not stressing here enough about how painful it must be for a woman to take all the care to make the fetus survive her uterus for 9months only to learn at the time of labour that the fetus had an abnormality which would make it incapable of survival outside the uterus.
It actually sounds like, knocking on your door and handing the gift into your hands and seeing it vanish in front of you. This should hit you, if you were indifferent about the gifts that he took away without your notice, as cited in previous section. Ok atheists find abortuses tasty, but creationist do count an “embryo” as a person. Their usual explanations for human suffering “god is testing you”, “god is punishing you”, “god is preparing you for something great”, are not applicable to the suffering of this fetus which a creationist values as equal to a person. What the heck are you teaching to an unborn who is gonna be born dead anyways? Why does god allow his “children” to pray for a safe 9months of pregnancy and a safe delivery and give them a dead-born child? Don’t you see that god is a psychopath here? Would you go like “god works in mysterious ways” if that child was to be your first born after a decade of infertility? But no, for the sake of your delusional faith, you wouldn’t have gone for an abortion if your fetus’s incompatibility with extra-uterine life was known much earlier in the pregnancy. Face it, you value your faith and hence yourself, over the growth of this embryo/ fetus into a stillborn. And so that your helpless attempt to safeguard your faith, your determination to not see your own idiocy and hypocrisy, will drive you to prevent other women from aborting a fetus that wasnt gonna survive anyways.
3)GIFTS THAT WOULD HAVE A SHORT, MISERABLE EXISTENCE, IN YOUR WORLD

It doesn’t matter if your child was diagnosed with encephalocele, retinoblastoma that is making its survival outside the uterus short and painful. It doesnt matter if scientists find out ways to diagnose this earlier in the pregnancy. Christians would simply end the discussion saying “its still a life”, “you still dont have the right to change nature”. Each year, 5 million children die before reaching the age of 5yrs. What purpose is served in their miserable little life? The very same people who say that “god called my beautiful child because he loved them” also hold that god is omnipresent. How does an omnipresent god fail to have your beautiful living child by his side? How does an omnipotent god fail to find a less painful way of doing that? Why send them on earth when they die before even knowing what life is? How does it still hold that god is in any way, pro-life?<

Some would hold that the suffering of the child is a lesson to the parents, conveniently forgetting the obvious implication of the child’s life being lesser in importance to the parent. If god and his followers can see a child’s life as of no worth but a lesson to others, how do they overrate this “gift lesson” over the life of the pregnant mother?

PINK: Are You Enlightened Or Just Entertained?

Once the movie circles up your thoughts, you need a good review such as this, that stirs it up nicely.

PSruminates

WARNING: Spoilers ahead but it doesn’t cause any real harm in this one. 

After the banality of clichéd content that managed to keep Bollywood on a rampant typicality and regular public in the theaters, came PINK that attempted to break the mold. With the name of Shoojit Sircar, and a just approach by the writer, Ritesh Shah, the audience FINALLY saw what us feminists have been yelling at the top of our voices for centuries. Yes, it took a mysterious training-mask wearing Amitabh Bachchan to tell the masses that “Dude, NO means NO!”

Don’t get my tone wrong, I loved the film just like you did. But let’s just give it one of those reality check reviews.

What’s for real?

First of all, no doubt, the storytelling deserves your love. A gripping and detailed tale of a hangout gone wrong takes you vehemently through the edges of three women’s attacked modesty and impeached personal lives before finally offering you a seat in the court where

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The veiled choice

Feminism isn’t about stripping your body off the veil (burqa) covering your body, it is about helping you acknowledge the existence of the veil of indoctrinated lies covering your vision about reality.

I write this sick and tired of viral pictures by misogynist Muslim men trying to compare their women with candies, chicken etc to show that it is a normal human preference for obtaining “objects” like candies as packed than otherwise, and that feathered chickens look better than unskinned ones. If you have been there, you know that the simple cries of “women are not candies /chicken / objects”, more often than not, fall on deaf ears. And how much more can you talk when the same arguments are held by women, without being labelled as a misogynist who wants to strip their hijab off and eye-rape their scalp hair, ears, nose and chin? How do we even have a chance to do it the thorough way, by using arguments about what constitutes choice or liberty, about what patriarchy and misogyny has done to their mentality, about psychological adaptations that occur in response to oppression and about evolutionary psychology for determination of what shapes female choices? You have to get down to their level and show them what can’t be unseen.

So I have made a short strip of pics. So that you may catch my point better, please glance through the pics first, without reading the commentary written in italics, because the pictures themselves say a point, when read in order. You can then go through them the second time with the commentary. And please read the disclaimer at the end.

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What do you do with your car in your garage or veranda? You are at home and so you won’t sit inside it, there is no point in flaunting its beauty to your own family, so you cover it up for protection. The car looks lifeless, but then it’s your property and subjected to your choice.


So when you have to go out in your car, you remove the covers, so you can freely see from inside the car and freely do all the things that using the car is about. You honor the car, for all that is added to it for looks and functionality. The car seems to have all the life and glamour because of your choice to take it out, use it and flaunt it. Again, your property, your choice!

When a woman is outside your house and fully covered, she is of no use to you, she is just a baggage, a bit more free to move than the car in your garage.

Through that net covering her eyes and noses, she can see just enough to not bump into random things and people, but you have not rendered her the freedom of observing the nature like you do.

She can take only just enough oxygen to survive, you have not rendered her the freedom to feel the fresh air on her face.

With those gloves, she can hold your baby and her little stuff in her hands, but you have not rendered her the freedom to feel the beauty of nature, including her own baby.

She can speak through her veil, but you have not rendered her the freedom to express herself through dozens of muscles of facial expression because of niqab, or through her body language. In the name of protecting herself from the dirty eyes of unrelated men, she can’t kiss her male child when out, nor can the child guess what her mom is feeling without asking her. Worse with a girl child, she doesn’t even have those secondary sexual characters you so jealously want to hide. Neither the mother nor the daughter can see what the other is feeling.


The scenario changes when you bring this precious luggage back home. You have already built up the idea that the outside world is too dangerously eye-rape hungry for inherently weak women to tackle by themselves. The gender roles of the game of chess are opposite to that in Islamic society. She is told that she is a queen whose needs to be inhibited for her own protection, that she is to be honored at her palace. True, except that it is the definition of “honoring” what Garrett Jacob Hobbs uses in the T.V series Hannibal. She is to be honored in the sense that her female parts, the parts that her make her the queen and not the king, are to be thoroughly made use of, for marital rape, reproductive coercion. When People outside their “palace” want to honor her in the sense of appreciating her existence by recognizing her face, she can’t do it because she has to cover herself from tip to toe. She can’t honor herself by freely feeling the good and bad of the world using her own strength, because she has to cover herself. She can only uncover herself when you want to honor her.

DISCLAIMER: I do not intend to compare women with cars, I intend to suggest that they are wrongly been treated as cars to an extent that at least some women have forgotten that they are not inanimate cars and candies to source their honor from others.

The message is not about when women should cover/uncover and how much they should uncover, it is about showing that it has wrongly been the exclusive choice of muslim men, who by imposing burqa on girls as yearly as 3 years of age and indoctrinating children about its false purposes, have made their objectification sound like a way of honoring women.

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Kuch bhi karega for candyman.